Saturday, February 28, 2009

the wrinkles

Friday night I was too tired to stay up late to blog. Joshua and I hung out at the house. We played and played and played. And finally at 9:30 he was ready for bed. I figured that since it was Friday night, he could stay up a little later....I hadn't really planned on a whole hour later, but it worked out just fine. Friday at work was another busy day and another day of learning something new. By Friday afternoon, my brain was on information overload. I am thankful to have a job that challenges me and I am thankful that I have a supervisor and team lead who are giving me opportunities to learn and grow. It is not often that you find a company that can actually let you grow and doesn't mind you learning new things. I think so many people in lead positions and above don't want people under them to over succeed and over take their position in the company. A downside but an upside as well at work right now is that a week or so ago a lady from my team was fired over a PHI issue. And now this week another lady from my team was fired for attendance issues. That leaves my team down to two people and one team lead. I know they are getting ready to bring in someone new because I hear the talk. It will be interesting to see who this new person is.

Joshua was in an exceptionally good mood today. He has been chatty and took naps when he could today. No major outbursts all day. Mom and I stopped into Hobby Lobby today to pick her up some things. I wound up finding some super cute accessories for the bathroom that I went ahead and got.....and pictures will be coming tomorrow!! We also stopped into Lowe's to see if they carried clear switch plate covers....btw...they do not. They used to carry them but can no longer order them. A quick stop at Wal-mart to get milk and picture hanging supplies and a even quicker stop at the dollar store for hangers (for the JBF Fort Worth Sale) and we were back home. Ah, yes....Sweet Tomatoes with my sister's family for lunch before they headed off the a day loaded with fun things to do.

When we got home, my mother and this ingenious idea to put my brand spanking new vinyl shower curtain in the dryer to dewrinkle it. I disagreed and said it wouldn't work but we went ahead with it anyway. 5 minutes later we go in to check it and I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.....as my mother pulled out this matted, shriveled, wadded, shrunken piece of what was once my kid friendly, fish themed shower curtain. I had based the entire bathroom redo on this shower curtain and now it is so cooked together that....I just don't know how to describe it. My mother called my husband to explain what happened and that she will find another one for us. My husband immediately got on eBay and found one. It offered a buy it now and he bought it now and Mom paid for it via her PayPal. So by next weekend I should have a brand spanking new vinyl shower curtain that I certainly won't be putting in the dryer. Who cares if it is wrinkled???? Not me!!!....the wrinkles will work themselves out.

Jeff should be home tomorrow around noon. And we will have to go grocery shopping and to Sam's....doesn't that sound fun?

I am tired of seeing stories on the news of people who would rather do things instead of being with their kids. They would rather go for a night of smoking/drinking and wind up losing their kids. And the people that would share these activities with their kids who are barely old enough to complete sentences tick me off even more. There are so many people out there who want children and can't have them and then some people are blessed with multiple children and do such awful things to them and with them...I just don't understand. I know everything happens for a reason. And I know what goes on in my own house....and I know that I would not do anything to hurt Joshua or bring pain to him in anyway. And these mothers and fathers don't care about their kiddos. They care more about themselves and party hardyin until they kill themselves or their kids in the process. Some people just don't deserve to have children. And then there are the mothers and fathers who decide that they can't raise their kids and dump them on grandparents or siblings to take care of. What kind of crappy person must you be to do this? What kind of person walks away from that cute little face that looks up to you and clings to your soul? How does one do this.....a heartless person? A careless person? A horrible person!! I might can see both sides of many things, but this is one topic that I have never and will never see both sides too.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

slow

I have been slow and unmotivated all day. This morning on the way to work, at two different lights, the person behind me honked to make me realize the light was green. I think I am not getting enough sleep. I think that I will go to bed early tonight. I couldn't concentrate on work stuff today and didn't get much done at all. As much as I like my job, and I really do, I just don't seem to fit in with my co-workers. It doesn't really bother me all the time, but today, with my unmotivated, non-focused self, it did. I don't know how to fix it. I am not from the 'hood or even necessarily know how to get to said 'hood.

Joshua was full of energy tonight. He was bouncing off the walls at some points. His fussing episodes are getting somewhat better. He will start fussing and then stop to make sure I am aware of the fussing about to happen. I usually am 10 steps ahead of him on them. He is getting funnier in his fussing episodes and I am finding them more and more cute. I think it is funny that to watch him test his limits. It is amazing to watch him grow up. This morning I finally got a yes answer to a question. He was asking for more at breakfast. I asked if he wanted a banana and he looked at me and said "yea". A yea that you'd hear just before the word duh. But it was a form of yes and I will take it! I was so happy. And tonight he actually took an interest in his potty again for the first time since the night he used it.

I don't necessarily follow mardi gras or lent as some people do. But I have decided to give up french fry's. I figure if I can give them up between now and Easter, then hopefully they won't taste good anymore and I can drop them for good. It worked for soda's...I decided one day that I wasn't going to drink them anymore and now I can stand the taste. It has been over 10 years and I never look back. I don't miss the headaches I used to get from them...or lack of them.

I'm heading to bed so that tomorrow I can be a bit faster than slow.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

thirsty hero

Today was a pretty good day. At work, both of the other girls on my team were out (one sick and the other in off site training all day) and it was just my lead and I in our little area. The supervisor came over and asked my lead to work some refunds, since our refunds guy has made an emergency trip to AR. And my lead taught me the first few steps in processing a refund. And told me in not so many words that she thinks I am better suited to work documentation than handle just calls. She said that this training would be good for me and that people are noticing. I suppose that is a good thing. The refunds gave me a steady headache, much like I had when I first started helping with supporting docs.

Joshua was in a great mood tonight. He is perfecting his pouty lip and the start of his so called fake crying. I have been telling him to "dry it up before it starts" and he does. And then smiles at me as if to say that he was just joking anyway. He is becoming quite the comedian. I have also noticed that he is bossy with his monkeys and cars. He will sit and tell them, "no monkey, monkey be nice". Makes me wonder if I say that too much??? Oh yes, this morning, he woke up at 7....45 minutes early. He was fussing so I got up and headed in his room. When I got in there we chatted for a couple of minutes, changed his diaper and then I brought him back to my room and went to sit on the bed. He didn't want to sit on Mommy's bed. He wanted to 'gitdown'. I helped him get down and then it was "mommy gitdown'. I got up off the bed and told him to show me what he wanted. He lead me all the way back to his room to his wooden train set. The set was Ethan's and is now Joshua's. So from about 7:05 until 7:30 this morning, we sat in his bedroom floor playing with this train. At 7:30, I told him I had to go take a shower and suddenly it was okay to leave the train set. I hope this does not become a morning routine with him.

Late tonight, I had let Chanci in. I knew she was thirsty so I filled her water bowl up and even put in extra water for her. She, being the goofball she is, stood in the kitchen and drank the entire bowl of water. Moments later I hear her starting to yak in the living room so I rushed in there. I barely missed seeing the explosion. Had I seen it, I would have joined her. It was so bad that she didn't even want to step over it to go outside. The smell....was H-O-R-R-I-B-L-E!! I just don't handle puke very well. I messaged Mandy online, who thankfully wasn't busy, and she came over to clean it up for me. It was so nasty....so nasty. I am thankful to Mandy for coming over to be my hero of the night. They are taking off tomorrow and I wish them an awesomely safe trip!

It's late and you know what time it is.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

i thought it was friday

This morning when I got up, I had the TV on as usual watching Fox4, and the morning anchor lady, Megan, is leaving. Friday is her last day. I looked at Jeff and said, "today's her last day"...very matter of fact-ly. Jeff looked at me with a funny look and said, "I thought her last day was Friday." Too which I responded, "it is Friday.". He looked at me for a moment and said "no it ain't, it's only Tuesday. I wouldn't be here if it was Friday.". It was very disappointing. Very. I was all happy cause it was Friday morning....I know I had been dreaming and my dream was taking place on a Friday. Ho hum....it is only Tuesday.

Work was uneventful. I worked all day. My lead attempted to train another girl on our team to do supporting docs and apparently she just wasn't getting it. I am the only one on our team that is doing them. To me, that is a good thing for at least 2 reasons....1. It keeps me busy all day every day....2. I am the only one so I feel more secure in my position. Security doesn't mean squat though in the real world.

Tonight consisted in a lot of running around. We swung by to see my cousin's wife, Christina, so that we could get some paperwork for our house notarized. Thanks again Christina. Then we grabbed a semi-quick bite to eat and headed to Jeff's work. He keeps his pay stubs in his truck and we needed them. We had decided to take Joshua and show him Daddy's truck. The few times Joshua has been to Jeff's work, he always thinks the big rigs are trains. And says, "choo-choo". So tonight, when we actually got out of the truck and walked in where the big trucks are, he was very quiet and very observant (I swear he is going to be the kid who asks thousands of questions.) In Daddy's truck he pushed every button there was to push and twisted every knob. I was a nervous wreck, but Jeff said it was okay because the truck wasn't running. Joshua was barely bigger than the gear shifter. I wish I had grabbed the camera, but we will try again for pictures when the sun is shining. He sat on Daddy's bed and seemed to think that was really cool. Daddy has more knobs back there to turn. Jeff started the truck up and Joshua wasn't such a big fan, but calmed down after a few seconds. After Joshua and I left to come home, he was asleep before 5 minutes of time had passed. I slipped him into bed and haven't heard from him since.

I need to slip into bed because well...I am just plain tired.

Monday, February 23, 2009

monday monkey

Today, was just another Monday. Joshua was in a good mood this morning. He went right on into his classroom this morning, no fussing. He even carried his own blanket and the toy he brought home Friday in himself. He waved good-bye and went about playing...I felt so wanted. Work was just work. I have gotten nearly all of the documentation they have had me working on done. So much so that this afternoon I had to work on other things. When I got back to Joshua's school to pick him up, he was standing at the front door and got all excited when he seen me coming...see, I knew I was wanted. Joshua has been in a good mood tonight, full of energy and very playful. He has started this thing where he pretends to start crying just to see if we will respond in his favor. We are on to his little game and normally call him on it, which leads to a pouty lip. A pouty lip that says, dangit.

Joshua is really starting to string words together for sentences. I really like the three word sentences, but am happy to get two word sentences. A cute phrase he is saying a lot right now is "I coming". Meaning that he is on his way. And he is all about hide and seek/peek-a-boo type games right now. He loves to hide things and ask "where go?" only to reveal that he hid the item under his legs...in the blanket....under the monkey....behind his back...or where ever else is handy. He has been stringing words together for a while, but lately I have noticed that he is doing it more and more and coming up with phrases on his on...like "I coming".

Tonight, Jeff and I worked some more on the bathroom. Another day and it should be completely done. We realized today that we still need shower hooks, we are probably going to just get a basic clear set for now. We have to find some fishy ones. The border paper went up tonight. Jeromy & Mandy stopped by to see Joshua. Jeromy got suckered into helping with the paper...mainly because I was too short for the job.

Also tonight, Joshua officially climbed all the way up the changing table. ALL-THE-WAY....

video

So now....we really need to make a decision about what to do about this situation. I get really close to him during the video, because he made me nervous and I moved closer. I didn't really zoom out in my trying to get closer. He tried again later, but did not succeed in making it to the top. At the end of the video he asked to "git down". Thankfully for mommy's nerves, he hasn't figured out how to get down, but I am sure it is coming soon. Not good, not good at all.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

what...the weekend is over???

Saturday, my mother, sister and niece came over and we painted the bathroom walls. At first I wasn't crazy about either color, but after the paint started to dry a little I like the blue (water) but not the brown (sand). This morning Jeff and I went back in the bathroom and the colors didn't look as bad as I had been thinking. We fixed the paint so the brown and the blue colors meet. It looks pretty good. And another coat of the brown really helped its shade. Overall, I like how it turned out. Not bad for a first time re-doer job. We had one slight problem when peeling off the tape....it didn't want to come off. It didn't let the paint bleed through, but at the same time, it didn't want to come off. We have now gotten it all off and Jeff has now got the lights and mirror back up. We bought a frame for the picture that will hang in there. Now we just need a few more accessories. Which is harder than it ought to be given that Jeff and I are disagreeing with what we want....surprise surprise!

Joshua has been extraordinarily fussy this weekend. Pretty much only content when I was either holding him or less than 3 feet from him. Yesterday his ear drained all day and today it hasn't. Tonight I went ahead and put drops in that ear and we will see how it does tomorrow and then he may go to the doctor on Tuesday. Speaking of doctor.....our doctor has left the practice. A lady at my mother's work uses the same pediatrician. She called Friday to get her son in and was told that our doctor resigned last week and that his "office staff chose to stay". Chose to stay??? Exactly why did he leave??? I really like our doctor but Jeff and I will instead choose the another doctor in the practice rather than track our old doctor down. We are choosing the doctor that spent so much time checking Joshua out recently when he was sickly...the one that finally said "Go to Cook's.". Can you see it now? You go to the doctor not knowing that your doctor is gone. And all the doctors are standing there looking their best just hoping that you will pick them? And bummed when they are chosen? The image is probably better in my head. (Do you see the risers they are standing on? How about the giraffe one of them uses as a wooing tool?....yea, I didn't think you seen it that way.)

I can't believe the weekend is over and it is back to work time. Can I have one more day please???? Pretty please....with sugar on top?and a cherry too???

Saturday, February 21, 2009

i have the power

So lately, every time Joshua bumps something, falls down, trips over his own feet or just has something that aches...he comes to me whining and pointing or telling me what hurts. I kiss it and it is all better. I have some serious healing power in these lips of mine. Most of the time, I don't even think he really hurts...he just needs to know that he is okay....but even still...I feel so powerful. If only I could have kissed his recent bouts of illness away.

He actually went to school 5 days this week....all 5 days....all day....every day!! And I in turn worked a full 4 days this week (Monday was a company holiday). All 4 days....the payroll folks are going to wonder what happened and why they are having to pay me so much suddenly. It feels great to have worked a full week. Here's to keeping this streak going!!!

I was ticked at the end of Private Practice Thursday night. I can't believe that I spent three weeks watching this crossover event to have the character who's story brought the two shows together decide that he is just going to up an leave to go back to New York. If it were my brother, I would be hard pressed to help him out again. All in all, it was a good crossover event, except that now I am aware of the goings on for Private Practice and will have to start watching. That is what the producers wanted though isn't it?

Today, I worked my fingers to the bone. I looked at some many lines of information that my brain was in overdrive. I worked a 113 page doc, called the provider back just to get her voicemail and left a message. And this urgent matter she was so irate about this morning, wasn't important enough for her to call back on this afternoon. Oh well...I bet I looked at close to 800 pages of information today. Tonight, I had dinner with my brother and sister-in-law. We went to Candlelight Inn. Mandy wanted to see the bar that my step-dad works at, so we drove down the street to check it out. Not a whole lot of people were there, but as usual Joshua was the life of the party. Everyone always loves him when he goes in there. Jeromy, Mandy & I played two games of pool. Mandy won both games...beginner's luck! Technically she lost the first game because she scratched...but even still....beginner's luck.

Tomorrow, Saturday, I will work on painting the bathroom. My mother is coming over mid-day to help paint and entertain Joshua. I am hoping to have it all painted tomorrow and then the border wallpaper can go up once Jeff gets home Sunday. Jeff won't be home until Sunday morning sometime. He has been from Dallas to Birmingham, AL to Dallas to Lubbock to Dallas and is now headed to New Orleans. 'Tis a great week for miles.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

joshua, joshua, joshua

Nothing bad came of our lunch meeting today. Just lunch and routine work stuff. Stuff everyone should already know and be doing. We are still moving our desks around and it should be happening this week.

I still haven't found my keys. I am convinced that they are in this house somewhere. I am sure they will turn up. It is beginning to feel strange not having my keys. I know I have Jeff's set of keys, but his aren't the same. They don't fit my hand well....even though they are the same keys. And they aren't colorful. My old keys were colorful and all of my store cards were on there. I miss my keys.

Tonight for the second night in a row, I let a pan boil over on the stove. Tonight it was because Joshua had spilled his tea and had slipped and fallen in the aftermath. He was fussing (and I was trying to get him up out of it before he fell again trying to get up) and I turned around and the pan was boiling over. Water/milk/butter mix everywhere. Great...just great.

On the plus side....Joshua was in an awesome mood tonight. He even ate his green beans, something he normally doesn't. He ate the 5 I gave him and even requested more. I gave him 5 more and he gobbled them up. Shocking....and Daddy missed it....I can only hope that Joshua will eat them when Daddy is home. Joshua and I played with his fish puzzle. We took the pieces out and I handed them to him one at a time so he could put them back in. We go over the colors of the fish as we go. He has stopped saying yellow and orange. All the others he says just fine...even purple. After we would put the puzzle together, he would clap his hands saying "yeah!". I asked for a high five and got one. I have taught him the....high five, down low, in the hole....thing. Now, he wants to do it all every time we do a high five...what have I done?

Joshua is not like taking a bath in the big bathtub in our master bath. I think he is overwhelmed by the size. And his head doesn't come above the tub so he can't really see out. A few more days and I will move him back to his newly decorated bathroom and he will be so happy.

Joshua was also convinced that his daddy was at home asleep. When I picked him up from school, he asked "Daddy?". To which I said, "Daddy is at work". Normally Joshua says work and moves on from this subject. Today he responded "Daddy sleep". I told him no, Daddy went to work. After a minute he dropped the subject. When we got in the house, he said "Daddy sleep". I said no. I had to go into the bedroom for something and Joshua of course followed me. He looked up on the bed and didn't see Jeff. He asked "Daddy" and walked around to Jeff's side of the bed. He checked the bed again and still no Daddy. I again told him that Daddy went to work and he again asked if Daddy was asleep. He checked the bed again and again and again. Finally he agreed that Daddy must be at work because he isn't in the bed. I think Joshua is figuring out that Daddy isn't home all the time. We knew this time would come and hope that it is followed quickly with an understanding that Daddy is at work and will be back in a few days.

Joshua also says, "J-O-Josha. J-O-Josha". It is funny. He will be reading something, like his paper from school that says what all he did today and he will read on the paper, "J-O-Josha". It is very cute.

It is Wednesday night, so I need to get the trash out.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

have you seen my keys?

Today was my first day back at work after 6 days off.....I am tired. And I am told that I will need to go back to working my regular hours again starting tomorrow. We also have a big lunch meeting tomorrow....sounds to me like they are buttering us up for something.

I have lost my keys. The last time we had them was Sunday evening. And now....I don't know where they are. We have looked all over the house, checked both the car & the truck and nothing. Jeff left me with his house key, mailbox key & truck key. I will tie them together with string in hopes that I don't lose them too.

Joshua's cough seems to be much better today. Thank goodness. I stressed all day thinking that the daycare was going to call and I would have to go pick him up. I am stressed that it will happen in the next three days too since Jeff will be gone. I really don't want to miss more work. I think the time I have needed off in the last two weeks is why they have put me back on my crappy shift. (It is not a crappy shift...after all, it could be worse.)

Now, I am just looking forward to Thursday night when the final Grey's Anatomy - Private Practice crossover comes on. But in the mean time, I must sleep and work.

Monday, February 16, 2009

spackled and primed

Jeff and I went had got our taxes done this morning. I was going to try to do them myself this year, but we wound up with so many new tax slips that we agreed to take them in. We should get our refund shortly. Which will be awesome, because I will be able to have my surgery.

Joshua still has a cough. It seems like it is getting worse. And I hate to say it, but I think he is sick....again. Flippin' again!! We will see what another day brings.

I go back to work tomorrow after being off for 6 days. I am looking forward to it. My department moves desks this week. We are moving to sit with our teams. I would think I would be one of the first to move since I am moving to an empty desk. Again, we will have to see what another day brings.

This afternoon Jeff and I worked in the bathroom. We primed the drywall. Then Jeff used the spackle stuff and spackled the wall all up. It looks pretty good. I like it better than the other wall. We went ahead and used up the rest of our primer and got all the walls primed. It is ready for paint.... but we are out of time this weekend. We won't get to work on it again until Saturday. No big deal, we knew it would probably take more than one weekend for us.

We had dinner with Daniel & Christina tonight at Sweet Tomatoes. It was tasty....the veggie of the month in the potato. So lots of potato things. And it was kids night, so there was a walking tomato head going around the restaurant. He kept stopping at our table to play with Adam & Joshua. It was pretty cool.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

the walls are falling down

Today, we prepared for the task of ripping out the wallpaper in our second bathroom. We have purchased (what we thought was) everything we need to re-decorate. Given how well some of the jobs were done by the previous owner, we expected a lot of difficulty removing the existing wallpaper. But surprisingly, the old ugly wallpaper came down pretty easy. The largest wall peeled right off in large strips. The border paper on the painted wall was put on with some heavy duty glue and took some soaking to get off. The larger wall is now down to the drywall and will have to be textured to match the other walls. A quick trip to Lowe's and we have the stuff that should texture the wall similar enough to the other walls. We will work on that part tomorrow as it got too late today.

Since Joshua's bathroom is all torn up, he had to take his bath in our big tub. At first, he didn't want to sit down. But once he did, he played and bathed and then didn't want to get out. He also has started shrugging his shoulders when he doesn't really know what else to do or say. It is pretty cute to see his little shoulders go up and down.

My cousin and his wife stopped by today. I had Valentine's things for Adam and when they got here, I couldn't flippin' find them. I was so frustrated. But of course, 15 minutes after they left, I found them. No big deal, I have to swing over to their house tomorrow afternoon. I am stressing over a shirt that I borrowed from Christina that I can't get a stain out of. I have been trying for months on this stain. I have tried many different things and this afternoon, my mother suggested another one. I will have to see how it comes out of the wash. I don't think she needs this shirt since her works uniforms have changed, but I am still bothered that I can't get it out.

Jeff and I decided that we would go out for a Valentine's dinner since we could. Joshua was asleep when we got to the restaurant and slept all the way through the meal. When I stood up leave he woke up but still was pretty out of it. He slept all the way to Lowe's. We made him wake up since it was so late. I feel bad, he didn't have dinner and didn't eat good all day, except for snacks. We will fix him a good breakfast in the morning. I am worried that he is coming down with yet another cold. This angers me beyond belief. I did a breathing treatment tonight, but he didn't want to sit still for the entire time.....only for about 5 minutes. He could have used another 5, but oh well. I think tomorrow night, if we do one, I will trap him in his high chair and let him color....perhaps that will help ride out the 10 minutes.

Tomorrow Jeff and I are going to have our taxes done. We are just hoping that we don't have to pay....we will have to wait and see.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day

The monkey we got Joshua for Valentine's Day. I will update the picture in it soon.

He loved the monkey!!!


That pretty much sums up my day. Oh yea, Jeff got home early to surprise me....sweet!

am i wrong?

Things that I find to be done in bad etiquette....

1. Inviting someone to a wedding shower but not to a wedding. Especially without making this a known item at the shower.
2. Inviting someone to a baby shower but not notifying them of the babies arrival.
3. Not returning a call to someone who is trying to reach you....unless you have a serious problem with that person.

And I am finding many people who agree and advise to not attending shower/parties for certain people in the future. And assuming that all that is in your possession is now yours and that some people just need some counseling.
____________________________________________________________________

I had a pretty good day today. Joshua went off to school for the entire day. He did great and came home with plenty of Valentine's & candy to go with. My favors were a hit with his class...thank you, thank you. He was in a pretty good mood tonight, just his normal fussing trying to gain his independence. He is back to great health. I am so happy about this. He does have a little cough especially at night, I will probably try to do a breathing treatment tomorrow night at bedtime and see if this helps, I also need to start his allergy medicine again.

And, I swear that his favorite sentence right now is "I color". All he has to do is see a pen, pencil, marker or crayon and it is the first thing out of his mouth...."I color". Sometimes it is "Josha color".

Tomorrow (or is it today already), would have been my parents 34 wedding anniversary. They didn't quite make it to 30 when my father passed away. My sister and I are planning a trip to the cemetery tomorrow. We need to take Dad new flowers. I think my brother may be going with for this trip. I do miss my Dad. I often wonder what he would think of Joshua and of my house and of my current life. I miss him looking at me over his glasses telling me "we need to talk". Those talks were always my father being protective about something. Most of the time, he was right on with his advice.....like when an ex-boyfriend turned out to be no good and Dad was right on when he had "talked" to me a month earlier. I often wish that in my fathers last two months, I had talked to him more rather than just sit in silence like we so often did. We would sit in his hospital room at lunch and watch CNN together. Looking back, I think I didn't ask him certain questions, because I new it was the end.

With Mom remarried now, I guess deep down I still have mixed feelings. But David is great. He takes good care of Mom and I think he genuinely cares about my brother, sister and I. And he loves Joshua.

It is already tomorrow for me so I guess I should go to bed.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

all good

Joshua had his follow up appointment at the doctor this morning. A final diagnosis of tonsillitis. The doctor was glad to see a much better looking Joshua. However, Joshua didn't have a problem with the nurse that let us in (despite the fact that it seemed every time they had to get some bodily fluid from him, she was the mean nurse) but he did have a problem with the doctor (who ordered all the mean tests). He didn't want the doctor near him and definitely wasn't down with any touching from the doctor. Disney's Cars was on in the waiting room, but we didn't even sit out there for 5 minutes. Joshua did get a clean bill of health. His tonsils are still slightly swollen, but should be okay in another couple of days. They no longer have white spots on them. WhooHooo!!!!

After getting back from the doctor, I made a mad dash to get the trash out before the trash trucks came. You see, I didn't get to this last night....instead I sat still for nearly 3 hours editing and posting picture on flickr. But they are done. I still have rodeo pictures but that is it. So again WhooHooo!!!! I also called Joshua's school to see if he could come in for a half a day to start transitioning him back into the daycare. The director at his school said yes they would love to see him back again. I took him in and at first he didn't want to get out of the truck. Then, when we met up with his class who were outside playing and he seen his friends and teachers, he was so excited. He couldn't get down the steps fast enough to them. Three of them came over to say hi. He was so happy. I was talking with his teacher and he said "bye Mommy". I felt so loved. He did great all day. No fussing and no arguing with anyone. So great. Tomorrow he can go for a full day and won't miss his Valentine's Party. I spent the day running around getting the favors for his class party....this was the only thing left for me to sign up for...and I felt bad not bringing something. But I don't mind doing the favors.....they are Valentine tumbler cups with Fun Dip, a necklace, heart stickers, bubbles and a heart shaped sucker in them. Very cute. I also did the favors for his Christmas party.

In the last two days, I have begun picking up the war zone that our house has become. With Joshua being so sick, his bedroom has moved to the living room. The dishes haven't been kept up with. But all that is getting fixed and should be all complete by tomorrow afternoon...hopefully in time for me to go to Joshua's party at school.

Jeff is out on the road. I don't feel like he is making many miles, but I haven't really been focusing on his route this week. He told me tonight he seems to be having issues with this truck and may half to put it in the shop when he gets to his next stop.....Dallas. That could be very bad, it could mean the end of the work week for him.

I am hoping to start on taking down wall-paper on Saturday in the bathroom. I will get the before pictures taken tomorrow. I know you will all agree that the green striped wallpaper must go. Pretty soon, it will be like stepping into an aquarium.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

why is it only wednesday?

Today has been a pretty good day overall. Joshua slept until like 10:15 and I napped from 9-10:15. I just couldn't convince myself to get up and get in the shower. It has been a long time since I have gotten to sleep in until 10:15 a.m. He ate a good breakfast a did fairly decent for lunch. We cleaned up the couch and organized Joshua bedroom. Tomorrow we empty the living room out back into Joshua's bedroom. Because he got up so late, he didn't seem to need a nap all day. He napped 15 minutes on the way to Wal-mart. And fell asleep on the way back home. I got home, brought in all the groceries....and then brought him in and laid him in his bed. He slept for the next hour. And was mighty fussy when I went to wake him up. This fussiness continued on into dinner....where all he wanted was corn-on-the-cob. He had a bath and went to bed. Now, he is fast asleep.

I called today and made an appointment for in the morning for him. Just a follow-up and to get a release to go back to school. He seems just fine. Has not run a temp since Monday morning.

The consignment sale is in like 3 weeks and I really don't have anything put together for it. I guess I should decide if I will participate. I know I will have to buy....it is how we keep him in clothes for the most part. I have a hard time justifying $10 or more on clothes that he will only wear for 6 months max. I know some people spend tons of money on clothes for their little peeps, but perhaps they just have money to throw away.

I need to get the trash out....so that is all I have for today.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

day two with no fevers

Monday night, after being asleep for much of the day, he wasn't really interested in sleeping in the middle of the night. At 1am Jeff fixed some mac-n-cheese and Joshua ate it up. I swear his tummy was grumbling all the way down to his toes (is that even possible?). After a few hours of being awake he finally agreed to go back to bed. Agreed to the point that he took himself in his room and climbed up in his bed, asked for his blanket and laid his head down.

Today he slept in but not as late as yesterday. I will let Jeff explain his getting up this morning. He ate a good breakfast and Jeff worked to keep him awake until a good nap time. After a nap he was back up and moving around. This is day two with no fever. I stopped by his school on the way home to pick up his blanket, I know it needs to be washed. I also picked up the list of kids names from his class. I had already bought valentine's for his class and figured I would at least take them in. I talked to the director for a bit and she said that Joshua should at least come in on Friday for his party since he seems to be feeling better. I will try to get him into the doctor tomorrow after or Thursday to get a release to go back to school.

Tonight we had dinner with my mother & David. They wanted to check on Joshua. Since my arrival home after work Joshua has been all over me. And dinner was no exception. He fussed after he was "all dun" for me to get him out of the highchair. I wasn't "all dun" so I kept telling him no. My mom got out the wipes and started cleaning him up. He didn't want her to do it, he was Mommy to do it...which is what he said, "noooo, Mommy get it". She got him up and took him into the nearby hotel lobby to run around for a minute. The hotel is being remodeled so there isn't much in the lobby. When I was done, he sat in my lap and was good.

We left and had to take Jeff to work, we had already dropped his car off there. Joshua was asleep and the lightening was getting closer. I sped up a bit hoping the cops would not be out like they had been earlier (they are horrible on Trinity). We got home and I put Chanci out and about 10 minutes later it came a storm. A big bad storm that moved through quickly. Thank goodness. I don't even think it is still raining outside, but an hour ago, it was storming. The sirens were going off because of circulation in the clouds in the area, but that quickly moved on...10 minutes later it was 5 towns away.....over by the airport. It takes me 20-30 minutes to get there.....and I drive fast.

Oh yes...I nearly forgot. My niece found out today that she has the flu. Lovely. I could hear the excitement in my sister's voice when she called to tell me. At least Joshua didn't make her sick. He had two flu tests in the past week, both of which where negative...surprise, surprise. I hope it doesn't keep her out for too long.

Joshua is asleep and I am going to get that way too. After not much sleep and a long day and I know a long tomorrow I could use the extra hour.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Not Mono??

Joshua stayed at home with Jeff today. I told Jeff that Joshua would probably be up between 7:30 & 8:30 if left to his own. At 10:00 Jeff went into Joshua's room to wake him up. Joshua stayed awake for about an hour and a half. By 11:30, Joshua was asleep on the couch. He slept until about 4:30 and woke up hungry. Jeff found every snack he could for Joshua who just kept requesting "more". The good news is that Joshua has not ran a fever since late last night. The bad news is that the blood culture came back today and was negative for mono. What? Two doctor's seemed 99% certain that he had mono. But the test is 100% sure he doesn't. He will probably be making an appearance at the doctor's office tomorrow or Wednesday. I am a bit nervous because if it wasn't mono they were saying meningitis. My exhausted self is having a hard time comprehending all of this. My son doesn't have mono? How can that be? He is everything that mono should be. My frustration has mounted. My top will soon blow if he doesn't get better. My work has agreed to let me be off Wed-Fri. Jeff will go back to work tomorrow night (hopefully).

I am heading to bed, cause I just can't wait to see what tomorrow will bring :)

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Mono

We went back into the doctor this morning and the doctor was super concerned that Joshua didn't look or seem any better. He ran a quick mono test that came back negative. He mentioned meningitis and sent us to Cook's with some paperwork in hand. He faxed the rest over and called to tell them we were coming. I was scared.

When we got to Cook's, it was so busy. I was remembering why I hate E.R.'s. But because the doc had sent over the paperwork, we were taken back within 15 minutes. I could feel the glares from other people who had been waiting a long while. They started monitoring him. The doctor came in and listened to what all had happened and been done this past week. He checked Joshua out and got a good look at his throat. He did a strep test that was negative. He said it looks like mono given how the tonsils look. There is always a chance it could be meningitis but we need the antibiotics out of his system to know for sure. In the meantime he can't go back to school until the fever stops. Which could be today, tomorrow, Wednesday or the next week. That means limited work hours for me and Jeff. We are to call the doctor back in the morning to followup and will probably need to go in on Wednesday.

So 6 days, $375, and 5 doctors later we have a diagnosis of mono.

I am exhausted. My arms ache from 6 days of holding a sick child. My back aches from rocking a sick child. My brain is turning to mush from day time TV. And there is more of it coming in the next week.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Another day with a doctor's visit

This morning we took Joshua to the doctor at 8:30. It was a good thing he woke up at 7:30 because I didn't have an alarm set. The doctor didn't see pneumonia on the x-ray but said that we would have to wait for the radiologist to read the x-ray. Since Joshua was still running a fever and his lymph nodes are still swollen and he was very fussy and very fever-y at the doctor, he gave him another shot of antibiotics. And then told us that we need to bring in back in tomorrow for another check out because the antibiotics will only last 24 hours. And hopefully the scan will be back tomorrow. Today was appointment number 4 (5 if you count the x-ray). At 35 bucks a pop that brings us too.....$140 spent on doctors appointments since Tuesday. And they still don't seem to be 100% sure what is causing the fevers and diarrhea.

After the exciting (not!) doctor's appointment, my sister and I headed off to Fort Worth to attend a Get Started meeting for the Breast Cancer 3 Day walk in November. We will be signed up by the end of the month. The meeting provided a lot of information. There were women of all sorts there. Some who were survivors, child or parent of someone with breast cancer, friends of people that had breast cancer and some like me were just there wanting to make a difference. It sounds like it will be an awesome experience.....or as Joshua would say....awsumm.

We came home from that grabbed a quick lunch and headed over to the Fort Worth Stockshow & Rodeo. We went in and see the horses. Took a picture with some and watched some others. We walked through the exhibit hall and checked out the goods. And sure enough, there was a guy there hawking the Sham-wows! I told my nephew that I bet the guy from the commercial was there and he didn't think he would be. And he was right, but there was a guy there who gave the exact same show.

The rodeo was pretty good. Tomorrow is the last day and some of the folks competing would be going home after tonight and some would get to try again tomorrow for some big money. We skipped the midway completely, which I am a little bummed about. I wanted to get some shots of Joshua at a couple of places to compare his size from last year to this year.

Joshua is still fussy and still running a temp. Sounds like another long day for tomorrow. Hopefully it will include some much needed rest.

Friday, February 6, 2009

107.1...what?

Well, today was the worst day so far with Joshua's fevers. When I scanned his head this afternoon because it felt hot, the thermometer read 107.1. What? I scanned again, it said 105.7. What? I scanned again and it read 104.9. What? I quickly found my regular thermometer and did an under arm temp and got 104.5.

I called the doctor's office in a panic....I wanted the test results right then. Instead, they said bring him in at 4:40. It is 3:00 when I called them. I gave Joshua Tylenol and his temp dropped. When he got down to 102.something he got the munchies. That is they way he has been all week. This is the only time I can get him to eat and it is always snacks. So, he ate yogos and a pack of gummy cars. Then, he laid his head down and went to sleep. I took the opportunity to take a quick shower. As I was getting out, he was waking up. I got us both ready and in the truck as my mom arrived at my house.

We were set to see another doctor as our pedi was out this afternoon. Flippin great, I am thinking. Another new doctor name I don't know. When we get there we wound up seeing a nurse practitioner....that I loved. She was great and Joshua acted all shy when she talked to him. A good sign that he liked her too. She agreed to do a urine sample given what I told her. He wouldn't go in the bag so they did a cath to get some. It came back fine. She went out to talk to another doctor I have never seen. He came in and introduced himself. He took a listen to Joshua. When he got to Joshua's back he listened very intently. Very intently. I was beginning to panic because he was obviously listening to something that concerned him. This lasted for what seemed like forever. He said he is hearing what sounds like some fluid in the lung on the diaphragm. And ordered a chest x-ray to check for pneumonia. Finally....something I feel is being productive. He also ordered a shot of antibiotic....finally!!! And now we got back to the doctor for the fourth time tomorrow morning for a follow up to the x-ray we went and had done tonight. At 35 bucks a pop this doctor's visits are adding up quickly.

And Joshua's appointment is just one more thing added to my already packed Saturday. Sunday will have to be a day of rest for me and maybe a margarita....cause this has been a long week.

We also went to my brother's baptism tonight. He has joined my sister-in-law's church. I am very happy for him and proud of him too. Mom and I showed up in jeans and Joshua in shorts because we left the doctor's office and headed straight there. No time to go home to change.

I am exhausted. I am going to bed.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Day 3

Today Joshua's temperature averaged about 101.8. We went back to the doctor today...to his doctor. Who checked him all out and said there is no obvious sign that he is sick (can I get paid to tell me the obvious too?) I love Joshua pediatrician. He went further and listened to Joshua's stomach and bowels. Both of which sound fine. He ordered blood work and wants me to do poop samples at home. We have done a poop sample before....before Joshua's first birthday if I remember correctly. The initial blood work came back quickly and seems normal. The pedi will call tomorrow with the other results.

In the meantime, Joshua has had one poop and it was so loose that it was pretty much sucked right into the diaper. (sucking poo - there's a good blog title) Joshua has been semi-fussy today. He and I played in the yard for a bit when we got home from the doctor. He refused to take more than the 15 minute nap he had on the way to the doctor. I could tell when his fever was spiking up because he would get clingy and either pale in the face or red in the face. He plays like he is fine. He looks like he is fun but still averaging a 101.8 temp for the day.

I am not sleeping well, in part because of Joshua being sick and in part for many other reasons. I swear I wake up once an hour just listening over the monitor for him. Joshua finally decided at 6 pm to take a nap. So he dosed from 6-7:30, just when I was ready to sit down for dinner. He three bites of pizza (literally) and then I offered yogos. So today he ate, nothing for breakfast, some broth from the chicken & dumplings we had at lunch, 3 bites of pizza and a package of yogos. I have an eating machine.....he has left the house....and has left a sick child behind. After the dinner Joshua ate, he requested a bath. After the bath, we got him into his jammies and he willingly laid his head down when I sat him in his bed. I haven't heard a peep from him since.

I am worried. I am tired. I am still frustrated.

I am hoping that his school will agree to take him for a bit in the morning. I doubt they will. And if they do, I doubt they will keep him all day. I will wind up missing another day of work. I just wish I could kiss him and make it all go away.....it worked when he shut his thumb in the door today. And when he stubbed his toe a few days ago. Mommy kisses it and it instantly feels better. Oh....that always makes me feel so good....like SuperMom! I just wish that SuperMom could make this fever issue go away.

Saturday is going to be a busy day. I really need for this fever to stop. Please.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Awesome Sickness

So, Jeff's work got him back home in the 9am hour this morning. And Joshua slept in until about 8:45. He was fussy and clingy this morning. This morning his fever was 101. And from there it has bounced all over the place. I left for work around 11 and left Joshua at home with Jeff...who had very little sleep over the last 24 hours. Fortunately Joshua took a 2 1/2 hour nap. He woke up and started filling up his diaper....repeatedly. When I got home for work, Jeff went to bed and Joshua and I left the house. We went to my sister's and hung out. I have given Joshua Tylenol around 6 for a 102 fever. The fever went down to 99 within 45 minutes. But shot back up to 101 an hour later. It is obvious that he is hurting and I just wish he could tell me where it hurts or how it hurts. After getting back to the house around 9:30, I gave his three meds and he willingly jumped out of my arms and into his bed. Still holding the monkey he carried around all evening.

Joshua has learned a new word or eight. The big new word is awesome....or awsumm as he pronounces it. It is so cute....which is the other word he has learned in the last few days...cute. After he says this word he gives us his cheese smile. He is amazing me with everything that he is learning. He also says 'getit'....which is not going to happen when he throws his ball across the way and tells you to go 'getit'.

I am also beginning to think that he is a few weeks away from climbing the changing table. I can see him now. He will either (1) climb up it like the monkey he is and be sitting on top yelling for mommy to come or (2) climb up it like the monkey he is and the whole thing topple over on top of him. I prefer that neither of these happen so perhaps in the coming weeks I should consider losing the changing table. We can do diaper changes on the floor, no biggie...except that I don't really want to have to get up and down off the floor for three diapers in an hour. I suppose I will wait and see about this climbing on the changing table issue.

Jeff has gone back to work tonight. He didn't ask for a turn-around. And I have this concern that Joshua will not be able to go to school tomorrow. I guess I will have to see what the morning brings. Joshua is really making me nervous with his fevers going up and down. All it takes is for the fever to go up or down too fast and he will have a seizure. This whole issue is causing at least 6 gray hairs a day.

It is late...actually it is already tomorrow now. Heading to bed.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Frustrated

I was working along today. Minding my own business. Working. Thinking about how much I am liking my job. Getting through the day. When my cell phone rings. It is Joshua's school. They have taken his temp and it is 102.1 and I need to come and get him. It is 10 minutes until 4:00 and I am thinking....he couldn't have waited one more hour??? I was in the middle of two projects and had to quickly get to a stopping point on them. They would have been done in another hour! I head to Joshua's school and see that he is drinking ice water and having a snack. He doesn't look sickly until I get up to him and then I realize he looks tired. A sure sign he is getting sick. I knew he was getting sick last night when he wanted to go to bed early, but I didn't want to believe it.

I pick him up and meet Jeff at the doctor. At the last moment, we are switched to another doctor. She checks him out, he is breathing fine, clear ears, no flu (per the test), his throat looks great. That is it. There is nothing wrong with him. He is still on an antibiotic and she suggested we continue to finish it up in case there is something brewing. I did not like this doctor. She was impersonal and didn't give me a chance to finish even one sentence. One more reason that I love our pediatrician. He is awesome. He always talks to Joshua throughout the exam. He listens to what we have to say and gives feedback. I highly recommend him and will give his info to anyone needing a pediatrician in the NE Tarrant County area.

So we bring Joshua home. Jeff and I are frustrated. He seems to be back on a cycle of sicklyness. Every 10-14 days it is something new. We had stopped giving Joshua his vitamins because the last two tries at it, he has had a seizure within a week of starting back on them. Perhaps I should get a different brand and try pumping him up on vitamins. Everyone keeps telling me that it will get better. He will get to the point when he doesn't get sick so often. The magic number is 3. 3?? Another year and half?? My work seems to be understanding, but I see the looks on their faces when I have to abruptly leave to go take care of Joshua. And I have worked for people in the past that seemed understanding on the surface but in actuality were not.

Joshua ate dinner just fine. He didn't want to try the Au Gratin potatoes. He saved them for last. When he finally tried them, he realized they were pretty tasty. I am sure he has eaten them in the past, I know I have fixed them at least once in the last two months.

Because Joshua was sent home sick today, he can not go to school tomorrow. Which sucks! I hate to miss an entire day of work. Jeff actually had a load tonight. They are supposed to be turning him around so that he can be home with Joshua tomorrow. At least for half a day. Jeff will be mighty grumpy tomorrow night, so it has already been decided that Joshua and I will be going out for dinner so Jeff can have peace and quiet in the house. The doctor would not give us a note releasing him back to school tomorrow. So frustrating.

At least he didn't have a seizure. See.....that is the positive side of this.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Yup-Nope

We have been working with Joshua on saying yes or any version of yes. Anything more than just a head nod. At dinner tonight, we were talking to Joshua and going though roll call of everyone he knows. At some point, Jeff asked Joshua to say "yup" and Joshua clearly said "nope". It was so funny!

Also, we think Joshua was trying to tell us he needed to go poop tonight. He seemed confused on how to communicate this request to us and it turned into a bottom that needed a bath. He never pooped, so we will have to see what tomorrow brings.

Jeff and I watched the last half of the Super Bowl tonight. It was quite a game ending. Glad we went back and watched it. Joshua was in bed before 8:30 because of the whole bottom-poop-bath issue. So, I am blogging early and heading to bed early...at least that is my plan.

Nothing much more to update. My sister-in-law was laid off today. The economy is bad right now and I really hope she can find something she likes sooner rather than later. Today is also my mother's husband's birthday. So Happy Birthday to David! I reckon he is my step-father, it just seems weird to say it like that.

That is my first Monday update for the month of February.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Good Bye January, Hello February

Saturday, was a pretty good day. My mother and I went running around....well...shopping....but not for fun stuff....just diapers & wipes at Sam's & the grocery shopping. That afternoon we headed over to my sister's to hang out for a bit. A bit turned into late for me. Joshua brought his MagnaDoodle that he got for Christmas over. He now says "magadoodool" It is so cute! We fixed dinner and decided that we wanted ice cream so my sister and I headed to the store to pick some up. When we got back, we dished out ice cream. Joshua seen that E & K got their own bowls. I fixed one bowl for he and I to share. Well, he got all upset. And wanted the whole bowl to himself. So.....we wrapped him up in a towel and gave him his own bowl. One scoop and a spoon. He was so excited. He ate it very well...sometimes with the spoon. When he got down to the melty part at the bottom of the bowl, he was sticking his fingers in and then slurping it off his fingers. It was funny. When the finger slurping no longer worked to get the last bits of ice cream out, he proceeded to try to lick the inside bottom of the bowl. He thought is was good stuff. I didn't get pictures of this because I was too busy monitoring the situation so it didn't become a bigger mess. Next time....I take pictures.


Jeff got home about 3:30 this morning and we slept until about 8:30. Joshua woke up and jabbered to himself until about 8:45. We all got up and had breakfast and then Jeff and I began cleaning. Jeff got the whole kitchen cleaned up. The counters sparkle and you can see your reflection in the floor. I worked in the office and filled our inside recycle bin with paper and filled the shredder with paper also. There is still a lot of work to be done in the office, but it is getting much better.


My mom came by for a little bit. I have been needing to make the pillow and blanket for Joshua's bed. I bought the material back in October but haven't really had the time to be still to do it. More like, I need someone to keep Joshua busy while I work on it. But anyway, Mom came down and helped me get my fabric set up and I stitched them both. He is now the proud owner of a space themed blanket and pillow case. This is his first big boy pillow....well, if 14 inches square can be a big boy pillow. I used all of the remaining material for the blanket and it is a good size blanket, much more than just crib size. (Note we still use the Noah's Ark sheet. We only have three sheets we use.)





This evening, we watched the first half of the Super Bowl. Then headed out to grab a bite to eat and pick up new drip pans for the stove. We got the drip pans at Wal-mart (which was basically empty) and got back home with them only to find that the 8 inch pan does not fit our stove correctly. They are going back to Wal-mart tomorrow. I don't think we can cook on our stove until we get drip pans and we ain't putting the old nasty ones back on! We looked around online and found a website that sells factory drip pans but they would cost us $60. We will try looking somewhere else first.